Girl Logic
by TrimbyJean
Summary: One-shot. Established Puckleberry. "The best thing about chicks is that you only have to be a fraction as nice to them as you are mean to them to get them like you again." "Is that why you had to beg Rachel to take you back?"


**A/N: So, I was watching season two's "Never Been Kissed", and I discovered sooo many moments (not necessarily Puckleberry ones) that I could turn into fanfics. I also just really love doing established Puck/Rachel. This one is almost completely canon, until it isn't. LOL. Anyone who's seen the episode will know where. I have it on my iTunes and on DVD, so the dialogue from the episode (WHICH ISN'T MINE) should be word-for-word. Enjoy =)**

**Rating: T, for Puck's mouth/mind**

**Don't own it (dreamy, whistful sigh) If only…**

**Inspiration: "The best thing about chicks is that you only have to be a fraction as nice to them as you are mean to them to get them like you again."**

"Dude, there's like, 300 bucks in here!" Artie exclaimed. Puck shouldered his guitar and looked around at the dwindling crowd, shrugging. He saw Rachel sitting at a nearby table, and she smiled at him, rolling her eyes. He raised his eyebrows in return.

"Yeah, you can't really put a dollar amount on talent plus fear."

Artie scoffed and held up a dollar. "I can, it's about 300 bucks." He tossed the dollar back on the pile. "What are we going to do with it?"

Puck shrugged again. "Buy a buttload of clove cigarettes, then who knows?" '_Buy Rachel something nice and take her to dinner.'_ Puck had given up any form of smoking for her (he was _so_ whipped), but he wasn't actually gonna tell Artie what he was doing with the dough. Him and Rachel hadn't exactly made their relationship public, outside of a few glee members (Rachel insisted that Kurt must have caught them making out in the auditorium, but Puck maintained that the dude just had some creepy psychic thing going on. Of course, Kurt then told Mercedes, who let it slip to Santana, who thankfully kept it to herself after confirming- from him- that it was true and cracking up about it). Most people only knew that she wasn't with Finn anymore, and that he'd stopped sleeping around. He still played the badass (he still _was_ a badass), but after Rach had come to visit him in juvie, crying and telling him how upset she'd been to hear about it from Mr. Schuester, and what had he been thinking, and she wished she could hug him (she'd sorta babbled, crying the entire time, and it'd made him feel like complete _shit_), he'd realized it wasn't that great of a gig in real life, especially if he wanted to keep Rachel (and he really did). So, he did his best to make her happy while still maintaining his rep as badass _numero wah_.

It was hard- like _insanely_ hard. But she was worth it. He shook his head and caught Artie looking at Santana and Brittney. "You want her? You don't need any cash for that, she's free."

"She was my first. Now I think I want her back." Puck kinda felt sorry for the dude, he sounded so depressed. He wouldn't admit it out loud, but Artie was pretty chill. He could jam, and he was one of the few people who seemed to relax around Puck once he knew that he wouldn't get pushed down the stairs or anything.

"So go get her." It was simple. It'd worked for Puck (kinda, but he liked to pretend the whole begging, pleading and whining to Rachel hadn't happened. In his mind, he'd just walked up to her, told her how it was gonna be, and that was that. True story was, after he'd actually told her how it was gonna be, she didn't take it so well. He'd never understand why chicks got all offended at being told plain, simple facts).

Artie shook his head dejectedly. "It's not that simple; I was kinda mean to her when I blew her off."

Puck grinned. "This is perfect. The thing about chicks is you only have to be a fraction as nice to them as you are mean to them to get them to like you again." It was true with most chicks, anyway. It'd worked for him really good until Rachel. With her, if he screwed up, he had to freaking beg on his knees for forgiveness, and usually ended up watching some dumb musical or Barbara Streisand movie with her (on the plus side, once he was back in good with her, she was really cuddly).

"Is that why you had to practically beg Rachel to take you back?" Puck looked over at Artie, who was smiling. God damn, at this rate the whole fuckin' school was gonna know (he still wasn't clear on why they weren't telling everybody, especially since it was kinda fuckin' obvious by this point. Something Rachel said about the "dynamic of the club" and "Ruin our chances at Nationals" and "Finn wouldn't take it well". Fuck Finn, in his opinion).

"How do you know that?" Puck asked, running a hand over his 'hawk. Artie shrugged.

"Almost everyone in glee knows you're dating. You guys aren't really good at being subtle about it. But Kurt cornered Rachel and got her to tell him everything, and then he told Mercedes, who told Tina, who told Brittney, who told me a few weeks back- before I blew her off. Apparently, you had to beg her to go out with you, and make all kinds of promises." He smiled again. "Rachel told Kurt you were very 'sweet and sincere'."

Puck groaned, mentally reminding himself to have a talk with Rachel about how she described him to anyone, especially one of the biggest gossips in school. "Look, I'm not sweet, okay? I'm badass. Say it with me, professor- Bad. Ass. And as for that other shit; yeah, I begged. Because Rachel isn't like most girls. And I'd do it again. Because I fuckin' love her. But Brittney? She's so dumb, she'd fall for anything."

"Don't talk about her like that!" Artie said, glaring up at him. "She's sweet and better than anyone in this school."

"You're just saying that because she popped your cherry."

Artie shook his head. "I'm saying it because it's true. Sure, Brittney's not the brightest. But she's pretty, and she cares about people, and she's never insulted me."

Puck threw his hands in the air. "Fine, whatever. You really want her? Just tell her that. Chicks dig that kind of shit." He put his guitar in it's case, on top of the money, and closed it. "I'll give you your half in glee." He said. "I got something I gotta do. Oh, and I swear, if I hear one word about that shit Kurt said? You're gonna have a date with the port-o-potty." He grabbed the case and jogged up the steps, where Rachel was walking with Finn, Kurt and Mercedes. He grabbed her arm, spun her around, and planted one on her. She gasped, but melted into him anyway (fuck, he loved kissing her). He vaguely heard Finn saying something, and he knew there were probably a few people staring, but he didn't care. He broke away from her and slung one arm around her shoulders, walking away from the crowd. She looked up at him in amusement and confusion.

"You're perfect." He said. "You're hot, and talented, and kinda crazy, but you're my girlfriend and you've never doubted me and I want everyone to know how awesome you are, and how fuckin' epic _we_ are."

She smiled and leaned up to give him a quick kiss. "Okay, but what is this all about, Noah?"

"Nothing, babe. Just trying some girl logic."

**A/N: The last part is thanks to my friend, who was reading over my shoulder and- when Puck told Artie to just tell Brittney how he felt- said, "That's girl logic." I couldn't resist =P**


End file.
